Staff reporter, Brooke-Lynn Burchett sits down with four women who were teen moms to get their thoughts and reflections about their experiences.

Jennifer Page was 16 weeks along when she found out she was pregnant. It was December 1994, and she had just turned 16 in October. She had mixed emotions, she often cried and was scared. Her daughter’s father was excited. His parents weren’t thrilled, but they were more accepting than her parents. Her parents were not happy. Page felt alone during her pregnancy. She did not
have a healthy relationship with her parents, and the rules at home made the situation not ideal. Her parents were not supportive. Page wishes there had been more help for her. There was a lack of communication and trust between teens and parents.
Page wishes there had been low-cost or free resources available to teens, like peer pressure classes or support groups. Being able to financially support herself was hard for her, and having a baby changed everything. She missed out on things teenagers should enjoy. Each person’s situation is different, but for her, it caused a financial strain and put pressure on her family. Even though she lived with them, she still felt alone. Growing up, Page and her parents often had falling outs. One thing Page remembered were her parent’s strict expectations. She grew up at a time when continuing a pregnancy out of a broken marriage was frowned upon. In her mind, that was never an excuse to alienate your child when they needed you, but Page thought to herself that she would not be that type of parent. She often thought parents forgot what it was like as a teen—the struggles, the hopes, the worries, and the feelings. She believed parents needed to keep an open mind and have open communication with their children. Page remembered how her own parents never talked about the struggles of family life or relationships. She told herself that if she had a daughter, she would let her know that having sexual feelings was normal, but she needed to be smart about it and not be pressured into things she wasn’t ready for.

She wishes there had been more resources, like counseling or support groups, to help teens. She believes parents needed to be more available, to listen, and to support. Education, she thinks, played an especially significant role. Teens often had blinders and felt they didn’t always see the dangers or think about how their words and actions could affect their future. Page wishes every teen could have a chance to take care of an infant simulator or work in a daycare setting for a semester to get an idea of what parenting was like. Peer influence was everywhere— everyone was saying, “everyone is doing it!” She remembers how the stigma surrounding talking about sex and contraception made it hard for teens to seek help. There was limited access to free contraceptives, and poverty meant even fewer resources. At home, there was a lack of education and communication about sex and teen pregnancy. Page’s older sister tried to help her by giving advice before she got pregnant. But when their mom found out, she got upset with her sister for talking to her about it. A few months later, Page found out her sister was pregnant, too. She would tell any teenage girl to wait. There’s so much life ahead, so many experiences waiting for you.

Having a baby won’t guarantee that the father will stay, or that the relationship will work out. Learn about yourself and be the best parent you can be when the time is right. From Page’s experience as a teen mom, and from what she witnessed from other teen moms, their lives were the ones that were affected the most. From their bodies changing, to their thought process, Page and most teen moms were the ones who willingly made changes in their social lives to care for their babies, often putting their own wants and needs last. They were the primary caregivers, not putting down teen dads—just speaking on her experience and what she saw.

Stacy Beckman was only sixteen when she found out she was pregnant. The news hit her like a wave, and she could still remember the look on her family and friends’ faces when she told them—they were shocked. Questions came at her from every direction, but the answer was simple: yes, she expected it, deep down. Stacy knew the main cause. There had been no protection, no birth
control. She realized now how important it was to learn about protection, but it was too late for regrets. The challenges started piling up—money, stress, school, and more. Sometimes it felt like everyone around her was having babies young, like it was some kind of trend, but Stacy knew it wasn’t easy. Her parents stepped in to help, offering money and space so Stacy could keep going to school. They reminded her that teen pregnancy affects not just the teen parent, but the whole family. With their
support, Stacy started to see a path forward. If she could give advice to others, Stacy would say: “Just wait until
you’re stable and old enough. Don’t have babies as teens on purpose.” She hopes her story would help others learn about protection and make different choices. Even though her journey was hard, Stacy Beckman was determined to build a better future for herself and her baby.

Amber Lee stared at the calendar—she was 4-6 weeks along. At first, the father was nervous, but then excited and willing to be there through the whole pregnancy. Her family, on the other hand, was shocked and worried. Lee nodded when her doctor asked if she understood what was happening. She realized that her lack of contraceptive use and not being educated on sex ed had led her here. Now, she faced no help with childcare, financial hardships, and relationship issues. Lee thought about how many low based income families that do not have access to preventative care face the same struggles. The relationship stress created worry and financial strain for Lee and her partner. She wished she had received more education on contraceptives and their use. Lee learned the hard way that education plays a significant role in preventing pregnancy, and she promised herself to share her story so others could be better prepared. She looked in the mirror and whispered, “It may be a hard road, but you can do it!”

Eugeina Parker sat quietly in her small bedroom, staring at the faded wallpaper. It had been four weeks since everything changed. Her family was disappointed. The father of her baby was not happy and wanted nothing to do with the child. Only her mother stayed by her side, offering gentle words and warm embraces. Rebellion, misunderstanding information, and the desire for love had led her here. Now, she faced high abuse rates, being poor, and severe depression. She missed being with her friends and worried about not having the ability to further her education. She was responsible for another life—making sure her baby was secure and happy, needing things but always putting the baby’s needs first. Her parents felt embarrassed, as if they had failed their child. Sometimes, she overheard them whispering at night, blaming themselves for her mistakes. But as she watched her baby sleep, Parker promised herself that, despite everything, she would do her best to give her child a better future—one filled with hope, understanding, and love. She wished she had known more. Information is key, she realized now. She thought about what her Bible said, what God wanted for her, and how important it was to love herself. If only she had known to use
birth control, or to always use protection like her doctor suggested. She now understood that the more you know, the safer you are. She wished she had talked to an adult, not just her friends, and asked for help before becoming sexually active. Peer pressure had been real. She remembered how easily she gave herself to the wrong guy and hated herself for it. Misery loves
company, she thought, and kids will make fun of you and call you names no matter what. She wished she had known to say, “Don’t listen.” Now, she knew babies cost a lot. When they get sick, they cry—a lot. They never sleep when you want them to, and they require lots of love, time, and energy. But even though she was tired and sometimes scared, Parker was determined to do her best. If she could go back, she would tell every girl: “Don’t do it. But if you do, don’t give up.”

There is always hope, and you can still choose to love yourself and your child.